WHAT DID I DO!?!?!?

Sometimes I want to kick a dog. And I like dogs.

So frustrated, so frustrated, how things just pile up and then ambush me.

What did I do to deserve this, to just become bewildered, stupid, ugly, and unworthy of everything I consider wonderful in my life? Are you doing this just to spite me? Really now.

Threaten to burn my house down, force deadline upon due date on me, leave me an insecure bundle of nerves that feels unloved and unappreciated...

And I still go to find some meaning in everything, to delve into something I don't understand, to become someone I don't know exists in me.

Pangs of guilt. Rejection. Feelings from last spring...Blinking through the tears that threaten to cloud my vision and blot my reader...

So many things to dread, so few things to look forward to. Drowning in insecurities and deadlines...

Oh, and the weather? Rain? Send it down south where they need it already, where all those people were rendered homeless and where people die and struggle.

I spurn you sometimes, God.

If I smoked, I'd certainly be doing that right now. Since I don't, I blog. Cuz it's my only way of staying sane in the mayhem that is my life.

So here it is. If you don't like my bitching, then fine. No one's forcing you to read this. Or comment. If you're going to be a dork and comment like you know what my life is like, don't. Just shut up. I go here to vent, not to be criticized. It's MY BITCH FORUM when I choose to make it so. Just because other people choose to sensor what they write about and how they feel doesn't mean I have to. Thank you.

Yes. I am a moody person. So shoot me. And no. It's not PMS. In case you were thinking that. Cuz you're wrong.